What does it mean to hold ourselves back? Why does this happen?
Some of the primary reasons this happens is:
For protection and defense;
To serve you in some way, to keep you safe, loved, secure, connected.
This program is an adaption, created to adapt you to your environment, to create harmony in response to conflict you may have experienced as a child or adolescent.
What does being held back look like? Some ways this may show up for you are:
Procrastination or shaky time management;
Feeling lost, having lack of clarity that is insatiable;
Not taking action or not taking risks;
"Bad" decision making;
Self-Sabotage
Staying overly busy
Chronic sickness or physical manifestations that take you away from moving forward
Creating a reality that stops you from moving forward
These parts of us, these adaptive identities - also known as subpersonalities - hijack our psychological functions - our thinking, feeling, imagination, body/sensations, impulse/desires, and intuition - how we experience the world.
So the key will be to be as aware, conscious, awake as possible.
What can you do to breakthrough holding yourself back?
Awareness: identify the part of you holding to back.
Acceptance: accept it with love; accept the past, take the wisdom; see it with neutrality.
Ask: ask it what it needs; why are you here? Why did I form this belief? Why would I hold myself back, what happens if I don’t stop myself? What can I provide to myself now in a healthy and balanced way?
Attention: create a relationship with this part of you. Keep developing your awareness and learn how to train your attention. Notice who is making the decisions and taking action- from the limited part of you or from your adult se
Action from Integration: what’s the quality? How can this be integrated? Take action from this space, from the both and, not the either or.
This is a lifelong process.
When you dive in, have lots of compassion and love. Remember to thank this part of you for it's service. It's probably been working overtime.
If you’re ready to dive deeper into the subpersonalities, my subpersonality deep dive may be what you need. You’ll get clarity and what you need to integrate this so you move from unconscious programming to conscious living.
